Posts Tagged ‘Charley’

The Trouble With Charley

Thursday, June 4th, 2009


My editor is going to love Charley — if I don’t kill him first.

Why? Because she’s always telling me I should write faster, get books out more often, etc etc etc.

But that means, what? Spending more time at the computer. Working my fingers to the nub. Not to mention my brain.

I have resisted. The well of inspiration is not a gusher around here. It’s generally more of a slow steady trickle — with occasional plugs.

That was all pre-Charley.

Charley, I suspect, has ADD or ADHD or one of those acronymns that I can never get right but that means he has the attention span of, say, a chicken.

Rooster, Charley says. Attention span of a rooster.

Yes, well, whatever you want to call it, Charley needs to be kept busy. Left to his own devices, he does not stay on task.

He is easily distractable — especially by anything with a keyboard wearing pink, red or purple.

While I’m pausing for thought, trying to figure out which Greek saint’s feast day we’re going to be celebrating in chapter seven and trying to use the internet to find it out, Charley won’t wait.

He is busy making notes in his little black book about which girly laptop he wants to ring next.

I didn’t even know he had a little black book.

Everyone has a little black book, he told me. Only now they call it an address file. Liz Fielding’s sexy “Liz Machine” is in it now, and Kate Walker’s new RED Dell Mini may be next.

More trouble is brewing on the horizon, too, because Kate Hardy is expecting a new laptop whom she intends to call Seb. He has already asked Charley if he wants to go out trolling for chicks!

I hope Kate gives Seb a few rules before she unleashes him on his peer group. I’m thinking Charley may need a curfew and it won’t help if Seb can come in any time he wants.

I’m not sure Kate mentioned if Seb was another of those sleek black laptops like Charley. I’m just hoping he’s not that Lamborghini yellow one Charley spotted this morning. I don’t need him having a case of laptop cover envy.

The only way I’ve found of handling these energy bursts of Charley’s is to make him work. He finished chapter six this morning and is working his way through chapter seven.

I tried to stop there and think a bit about the next scene, but Charley didn’t want to quit.

Once he’s on a roll, he won’t settle down. He just wants to keep writing and writing and writing (which is why my editor will love him).

When I say I need a break or to go to the grocery store or think about where the story goes next, he starts prowling the internet looking for new girlfriends.

I suggested yanking out his wireless card. It’s what I used to have to do with Old Wonky when he either spun his hourglass forever or got seriously overheated. But it won’t work with Charley. His wireless card is built-in.

I’m thinking he needs some games to play. Got any suggestions? I’m not sure he’s a spider solitaire kind of guy. He might need something a bit more, er, action oriented than that.

Something with guns and spies and going undercover, Charley says. And girls with keyboards (goes without saying). Ideas welcome.

In the meantime, I know what I’m going to do with him tonight. I’m going to send him downstairs at 8:00 to watch the premiere of the third season of Burn Notice.

Only problem there is that I won’t be upstairs thinking. I’ll be downstairs, too, watching it with him.

Flirting with Charley

Wednesday, June 3rd, 2009

Charley could be trouble.

On the plus side, he works hard, he’s competent, he has stamina, he hasn’t crashed yet, and he hasn’t overheated.

On the downside, he’s a babe magnet.

Worse, he knows it. Oh, dear.

He’s been propositioned twice in the comment section (once by a luscious pink Aussie laptop and once by a hot lipstick red babe called Dell who lives in England). Today, when I took him to the hospital to work while I waited for my neighbor who was having surgery, he got propositioned three times!

By women who didn’t even have computers. They wanted him for themselves!

Word is spreading.

Mary Ann’s hot red Vivienne has been calling and leaving messages. The lady in the hospital gift shop told him she already had diamonds, she just needed a good . . . um, computer.

He’s listening. He’s got out his little black book (or the digital equivalent thereof) and he’s taking names and numbers.

I’m concerned. I had no idea he was going to be so . . . appealing. Not to everyone else, that is.

He says I should be glad he makes friends easily. He’s even arguing that we ought to go to a conference where he can meet my friends. I don’t think so.

I think he’s going to stay right here and help me finish Demetrios and Anny, and then if he’s very very very good, he might (MIGHT!) be the computer who gets to come with me when I head back to Montana and Washington in July.

I told him that.

He said he is very very very good.

And then he winked at me.

My New Hero

Tuesday, June 2nd, 2009


Shortly before 10 this morning the FedEx guy appeared on the doorstep bringing me my perfect computer.

The fact that it appeared 3 days earlier than promised is, to my way of thinking, a good sign.

So was my first impression.

Right out of the box Mr Refurbished looked stunning and handsome, sleek and slender, with rock hard muscles and wearing a burnished silver and matte black suit. Handsome, indeed.

But looks, as we know, aren’t everything.

Deep down where it counts, though, he seems pretty impressive, too.

He’s fast, for one thing. But in a good way. He has a lot of memory (won’t be forgetting the important things, I’m sure). He doesn’t get all hot and bothered the way his predecessor did (at least so far he’s stayed cool and calm under a day of arduous testing and having his programs tweaked). No sitting on the wastebasket to cool his ardor yet.

He hasn’t crashed once. And he hasn’t spun his hourglass for, well, hours , either. Always a good thing.

I added him to the network and he seems to be playing nice with the other computers. I was going to add him as AM-laptop, but he took exception. He told me he has a name.

His name is Charley.

I’ve never had a laptop with a name before. I feel almost like he expects me to write a book about him.

Next thing you know he’ll be angling for a little pink laptop girlfriend. Or, possibly worse, one of those lipstick red ones like my friend Mary Ann has. That laptop is positively dangerous.

I can see right now that I’m going to have to be careful about where I take him. He may be easily led astray. I won’t be able to leave him alone with Mary Ann’s stunning red honey of a laptop, that’s for sure.

On second thought, maybe I should.

Would they have little laptops, do you think? There’s a thought.

Anyway, so far the news is good. Charley seems to be everything I’d hoped he would be and more.

But, of course, this is the honeymoon.

Tonight he gets to tackle the last of a chapter of Demetrios and Anny. It’s all been fun and games here up til now. We’ll see how Charley likes real work.

I wonder if he knows how to sail a boat.